Who I want to be...

In this moment I pose the question, “Who do I want to be?”  This is a really great question as the answer begs so many possibilities.  There is so much to who I am and to whom I want to be, and for whom.  I want to be a lover!  That is what I want to be.  I want to love my life, my family, my friends and others, everyone I meet.  I want to love a special woman and grace her with a constant shower of love and understanding, friendship and true caring.  I want the connection to be so great, the spark always there combined with real commitment, true loyalty and honor.  I want to love my children and help them grow to be strong, smart and wise, to lead the lives they want. The choices they make may not be my idea of ‘shangri la,’ but as long as they can express themselves and discover self-actualization, it’s okay.  I want to love my grandchildren and give them the best I have to offer, my sensitivity, my tears, my kisses, my caring and the wisdom their parents refused to heed.

I love my parents, they are so incredibly special, maybe I always did not listen, take heed or live up to the best of their expectations, but their love never left me.  From my parents, I have learned compassion.  They may not always show it and speak a tough talk, but they always melt.  Their dedication to each other now going on 50 years is a tribute to themselves and the power of God within their lives.

I love my siblings and want to acknowledge to them without question, I am always here for them.

I want to love my friends and their children; I want my friends to know they can always call me.  The best of my talents belong to them, and always are available for the asking.  I may not always be graced with all the riches of the world; however they make my life rich.  I want them to know I love them and their children, and I pray for them every day and ask God to bestow the greatest blessings on heaven and earth upon them.

I want to love myself!  So many of us do not, we conjure up fear, anxiety, and false realities.  Rather we must humbly recognize our own brilliance in the quiet shadows of the day unbeknownst to others.  There are so many possibilities in our lives, why do we stop ourselves?  I want to be the best I can be and write, paint, give, care, teach, speak, sell and change the world and turn it upside down.  I want to pray such deep prayers, that God stirs within my soul at the moment of their utterance, and know with so much vivid clarity that He is there, causing me to tremble. 

I want to kiss everyone, and to never be afraid to do so, or to take the hands of others and hold them, look them in the eyes, and soulfully connect with their spirit.  I want to go somewhere and dance in the streets, jump for joy, smile broadly and laugh voraciously. I want to wake up with one shoe on and one shoe off and wondered what happened. 

I want to travel the world before it ends.  You may not know it, but you might just be coming along… Paris, London, The Great Wall, the Taj Mahal, navigating the desert on camelback, rafting the waves, sail boarding, diving in the deep and frolicking on Islands with white sand, taking on the Bush, or maybe exploring the ruins at Machu Picchu.  There is too much to do and we’re going to make time to do it!

I want to teach you to live, live, live.

We work to fund the rest of our lives, the problem is we spend so much time planning our work; we fail to plan our lives.  It is time to end that nonsense!  There is no reason to live with regret for the things we did not do in the name of chasing a rat.  Yeah, you and I are going to chase rats, and we are going to be wildly successful doing so; but we are also going to make the race our own, and live exceedingly fulfilled.

I want to be the person who inspires himself and others to live well.  Living well does not mean you are eating steak every night, or without heartbreak and hurt. Living well is to acknowledge the resources of God to always overcome life’s hurdles grow and become stronger.  There are some of you who have lifted me up in your own special way with your resources, love and caring.  And I know the reason is you believe in me, and know that together we will experience brighter, happier days.  And you also know I will always be there to help you when you need it and recognize our mutual gratification for one another is truly sincere.  

In Eric Osterle’s senior seminar class at Purdue, an old man from near Peru, Indiana visited class one day and said, “Opportunities lie in windrows!”  He was indeed right, they are absolutely everywhere, all we have to do is open our eyes, pick up the phone, send an email, knock on a door, write a note, connect with others and be unafraid to look beyond what we know.  It may cause us to stretch, but it is worth the stretching.

We all pride ourselves in being hard workers, hard work itself never made anyone successful.  It has taken me years to learn this fact, it is the smart worker putting first things first that makes the difference.  It is also our own ability to overcome our fear of rejection and just move forward. We must proudly pronounce to the world, ‘Carpe diem – seize the day!’ 

I want to love people whom I do not know and yet to meet.  I want to help people who are unable to help themselves, to find ways to enrich their lives even if on the most basic level of life.  I want to teach others to reach outside of themselves and become who God created them to be.  He did not place us on earth to live in obscurity. The shadows are no place for you and I.  The world is our stage, and this is our moment to shine, to live distinctive lives.  The whole world does not need to know our name, but if to each other we are iconic, that is enough celebrity to distinguish ourselves to one another.  We comprehend who we are, appreciate each other’s strengths and live with humble gratitude recognizing the impact we have stamped upon each other.  Rather than to live selfishly, you and I have chosen to live differently.  I love you, I want you to know this in a very real way.  The greatest honor, the greatest gift I can ever receive is when you reach out to me and say…. with great sincerity those three words and together we smile, soulfully embrace and experience in that moment eternity.